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That is what my answer to the question asked by my patient is.
To my mind Rahul should be more open, if not overtly looking to hunt a partner. He has every opportunity to share the nature of his illness to his prospective spouse whether she comes a natural way or through an arrangement as is the case in India for most.
How should he do it?
He should do this in an open straightforward manner without sounding either guilty or insecure about the future of his relationship. Even people without an ailment have heart breaks. His potential spouses should have a right to approve, choose, or discard him. A person contemplating marriage to some one like Rahul, should give enough time to self so that one doesn’t marry out of “pity”.
Similarly, Rahul should prepare himself for a negative response. Remember, his potential spouse had that right even if he had not had the medical problem… Her right needs to be respected.
I have heard of people concealing their status even those who are carrying HIV virus or have full blown AIDS! for the sake of marriage. Their spouses, whom they infect in due course have been abandoned after they pass away. Not only this, the stigma of AIDS, takes its toll as well. There are reports where a wife has been held responsible for the disease, even though she contracted it through her deceased husband.
Message to Rahul:
Open up…
Look for a potential mate…
Share honestly…
Don’t feel rejected! Every human has a personal dignity, so in true sense, a human rejection is simply a subjective perception.
If a proposal is turned down, it saved at least two lives….
And finally even without the ailment, your marriage could fall apart…
So be happy.
Every single person can be married any moment.
But every married person can’t be single so quickly!
A single person’s life is better than that of a person in a wrong relationship.
Looking forward to your marriage invitation, Rahul …!
::
That is what my answer to the question asked by my patient is.
To my mind Rahul should be more open, if not overtly looking to hunt a partner. He has every opportunity to share the nature of his illness to his prospective spouse whether she comes a natural way or through an arrangement as is the case in India for most.
How should he do it?
He should do this in an open straightforward manner without sounding either guilty or insecure about the future of his relationship. Even people without an ailment have heart breaks. His potential spouses should have a right to approve, choose, or discard him. A person contemplating marriage to some one like Rahul, should give enough time to self so that one doesn’t marry out of “pity”.
Similarly, Rahul should prepare himself for a negative response. Remember, his potential spouse had that right even if he had not had the medical problem… Her right needs to be respected.
I have heard of people concealing their status even those who are carrying HIV virus or have full blown AIDS! for the sake of marriage. Their spouses, whom they infect in due course have been abandoned after they pass away. Not only this, the stigma of AIDS, takes its toll as well. There are reports where a wife has been held responsible for the disease, even though she contracted it through her deceased husband.
Message to Rahul:
Open up…
Look for a potential mate…
Share honestly…
Don’t feel rejected! Every human has a personal dignity, so in true sense, a human rejection is simply a subjective perception.
If a proposal is turned down, it saved at least two lives….
And finally even without the ailment, your marriage could fall apart…
So be happy.
Every single person can be married any moment.
But every married person can’t be single so quickly!
A single person’s life is better than that of a person in a wrong relationship.
Looking forward to your marriage invitation, Rahul …!
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2 comments:
good answer MJ. ur rational thinking at its best!!
Thanks Kautubh.
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